(Cup)cakes

(Sources: Photo 1, Photo 2)

Deciding whether to serve cake or cupcakes at the reception has not been easy. Originally we thought we would have a small tier cake and a couple sheet cakes, but then I decided it might be cheaper and easier to serve cupcakes and make them ourselves. However, I started to have my doubts. Cupcake stands can be pretty expensive, even cardboard ones on eBay, and baking enough for around 130 people would take some time. Maybe hiring a pro to bake a cake for us wouldn't be such a bad idea, especially since we already have family members handling the rest of the food.

Finally, I asked Nathan, "Cake or cupcakes?"
He paused, put on his thinking face, exhaled deeply, then said, "Cupcakes."

(Source)

We feel that cupcakes have several advantages, including:
1. No one is stuck cutting at the cake table.
2. We can have as many flavors as we want.
3. There's no need for a fork.
4. They require much less assembly and decorating.
5. Neither of us have actually seen cupcakes at a wedding, so even though it's becoming more common, it might be new for some of our guests too.

(Source)

For some reason, my mind was still stuck on thinking that we need to have at least a small cake no matter which option we chose so that we could cut it, but Nathan doesn't see the point. Once I thought about it, I realized that there really isn't one other than the fact that it's a tradition. People might expect it, but it shouldn't ruin their day if we don't cut the cake. We could always cut a cupcake.

Do you think the bride and groom cutting the cake is an important tradition?

Are you a grownup?

 

I was taking Nenya for a walk one day last weekend when a little girl came running towards us asking if she could pet her. I knelt down to get Nenya to relax, and she rolled onto her back and let the girl rub her belly. After we stood back up, she asked,

"Are you a grownup?"
"I suppose you could say that," I answered.
"Huh? Are you a grownup, or are you a teenager?"
"Well, I'm 23 and I have a job, so I guess you could call me a grownup."
She thought about this for a moment before deciding, "You're a teenager."
"Oh, okay, that's good to know."
"But you're a young adult!"

It was a funny experience, but it made me realize that I really don't feel like a "grownup." Ten, even five years ago, I would have thought that at age 23 with a real job and a fiance I would feel like a grownup, but I really don't. Maybe getting married and living with my husband will make a difference, but I'm not sure that it will. Maybe I'll feel like a grownup when I have a baby, maybe when my first child starts school...but maybe not. I kind of wish I'd asked that girl what would make me a grownup.

Do you feel like a grownup? At what point did you start to feel that way?

You put THAT on the registry?!

I'm not sure what is really considered a "normal" wedding registry these days. With the average age for a first marriage on the rise, many people are living on their own before marrying. Nathan and I are both currently living alone in apartments, and we each have skillets and pans, dishes and glasses, tables and chairs... The only thing we will really need once we're married is a queen size bed and some bedding.

We couldn't exactly ask ourselves "Do we absolutely need this?" when creating our registry or it would have only a handful of items on it. What did we ask? As it turns out, Nathan and I asked ourselves (and each other) different questions. My thinking was along the lines of "Would someone actually buy this?" while Nathan's was "Would we use this regularly?" Some examples...

Nathan was baffled when he looked at our registry online and saw this leaf platter. How often would we actually use it?

Then I realized that Nathan had made his own addition as well...

A Nikon D300 S. Who would buy that for us?

But don't get me wrong, putting together didn't cause us any real conflict; for the most part we just laughed at each other. Plus, there were quite a few items we agreed on.

I think we've talked about getting a Wii pretty much the entire time we've been dating. We haven't been able to buy one yet since we've had other priorities, so it was a registry must.

Our registry is currently about 40% items related to camping and outdoor activities, including a couple of these sleeping bags. We're really excited about going camping together, so we need the gear to do it.

We've also picked out some kitchen items that we would definitely use if we had them.

I'm pretty excited about making some real waffles with this waffle maker.

  

 

Nathan would love to grill chicken on this huge George Foreman grill.

I'm excited to see what everyone ends up choosing for us!

A Problem and a Solution

I had a bit of a wedding panic attack yesterday. Something that I hadn't considered to be an issue suddenly convinced me that having a wedding at the venue we've booked wasn't even a possibility, and I immediately began looking for other locations.

The source of the problem was this:

There's a picnic shelter right behind where we plan on having the ceremony (you can see it in the distance), and it is going to be rented for a company picnic at the same time we're having our wedding. I hadn't considered it a problem before since it's far enough away that you really wouldn't be able to see or hear anyone over there. But while working on the map to put in our invitation, I looked at the satellite image and realized that there isn't any sort of parking lot over by the picnic shelter. Were all of the limited parking spaces going to be full before our wedding even had begun?

Well, Nathan called the lady who manages both locations, and it turns out that (unlike at other parts of the park), you can actually park on the grass! She's had 200 cars parked along the drive before. Phew!

Once we'd solved that issue, Nathan and I decided to take a trip out to the park to plan where we are going to set up the food, gift table, and everything else.

Some of the seating for the reception is inside an old house, and the rest will be outside under a tent. I'm REALLY hoping it doesn't rain on our wedding day. I tell people that it's "not allowed," but Nathan and I did work on various rain scenarios while we were out there.

We took some measurements of the rooms to get an idea of how many tables we could fit in each one. Nathan kept saying that he wasn't going to put it in Visio but...

He couldn't resist, not that I expected him too. He's just awesometastical like that.

I felt much better after we did some more planning and got a better picture of how it's all going to work. I can't say we have it all under control since some things are beyond are control, but at least we don't have to find a new venue with only three months before our wedding.

My Wedding Planning Tools

With so much information about wedding planning online, I haven't felt the need to buy any wedding magazines or books. I've looked through wedding magazines in the store, but I never found any that were spectacular enough to buy.

I did consider buying one wedding planning book, The Wedding Book: The Big Book for Your Big Day by Mindy Weiss. It has 500 pages, excellent reviews, beautifully designed pages, and is only $23.10 on Amazon. 
 

So what stopped me from buying it? According to one review on Amazon, "the author specifically states that weddings of around $5,000 can not be done and look good. This is a good book if you are going extravagant, but not if you are looking for simple."

Oh. Never mind.

I actually ended up not buying any wedding books at all. However, my future mother-in-law found this book and gave it to me before I was even officially engaged:

Bridal Bargains: Secrets to Throwing a Fantastic Wedding on a Realistic Budget by Denise Fields and Alan Fields

 The book is now in its 9th edition, but the one I read is actually the 4th edition, from 1998. Although some aspects are laughably dated (like the "Brides in Cyberspace: What's on the web?" sections with mile-long URL's), it still has good information. Each chapter focuses on a particular topic, such as cakes, flowers, and catering, and lists shopping strategies, questions to ask, money saving secrets, pitfalls to avoid, myths, and more. Some of the sections I kind of skipped through since we didn't really do a lot of shopping for our invitations, officiant, or videographer, but I would still recommend it to any brides who want to get to most value out of their small budgets.

My biggest wedding planning tool has probably been my flash drive, which I use to store inspiration photos, my guest list spreadsheet, the files for my invitations, and all my other digital files. But to keep track of my receipts, contracts, and notes, I use this Five Star notebook:

I used this notebook in college, but not nearly as much as I use it now.

It has tabbed sections, which I've labeled Vendor Info, Expenses, Contracts, Guest Info, and Notes. In retrospect, these probably weren't the best division since I could have easily put the one contract I have so far under vendor info. I think I may change Contracts to Premarital Counseling so that those notes separated from my other random notes.

The Vendor Info tab has pockets on it, which I use to keep track of business cards and brochures. The Expenses pockets are where I keep my invoices and receipts.

 

 (Can you guess what Nathan and I each did on this page?)

The style is similar to a three-ring binder, but the cover and rings are both soft, allowing the cover to fold around and stay flat like a notebook.

Although big wedding planning books and binders may be useful, there are less pretty and less expensive alternatives.